On the importance of focusing on the positives :)

It’s been a while | I know I shouldn’t have kept you waiting | But I’m here now

Cheesy, I know, but I feel bad. Sorry for keeping y’all waiting. It’s been a rough couple of months (obviously NOTHING compared to the month that those Nigerian girls or even the citizens of the Ukraine have been going through – you should definitely pray for them – but I have been in my own relative purgatory), and I’m finally starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel. Let me start with some general updates:

  • Took the MCAT
  • Finished repackaging my thesis for publication — and it got accepted at the AEJMC conference in Montreal!
  • Accepted a Board of Directors position on the Communication committee at American Advertising Federation-Baton Rouge
  • Planned my brother’s bachelor party
  • Dealt with the normal friend and family drama
  • Dating.

So these past two months have really shown me the effects of putting words out there. Once something is published, it’s there forever. No one can take that away from you. While I had fun posting about my relationship woes of the past year, I think it is time for me to move past that and discuss topics I find more pertinent. Relationships and dating, those things are pretty much the same. They suck when you’re in your early twenties: no one really knows what they want, people lead others on, it’s all about experimentation. And that type of blogging can get old real quick. So I’ve resolved to not bore you readers with dumb anecdotes about mixed signals, potential matches falling for your best friends, people trying to live up to Ludacris’ “Area Codes” song. There is more to me as a person than those dumb stories, and also, it isn’t good to dwell on past negative experiences, especially if you plan on working toward a better and brighter future.

Another thing I noticed about myself, which I’m sure many of you may do too, is that I would reflect the perceptions others had of me – after going through those many trials and tribulations, I had started to question what made me so special and amazing. And that’s when I would let in a lot of stupid suggestions on things I should do from people who really did not know me at all. People will ALWAYS have something to say about your actions, btw. Because it is easier to pick out someone else’s flaws than it is to address your own. So my own self confidence started to waver (just a bit). And it was enough to almost shake me up (just a bit). But that’s when I realized that it’s not about how others perceive you – it’s about how you perceive yourself.

The confidence you portray will be reflected by others back onto you. You have to be that source of light and reflect yourself onto silver-based mirrors – those have the best reflectivity lol. SIDE NOTE: I’m about to get really scientific on you… But really, think of the people around you as a body of water and your confidence as a ray of light reflecting on the surface. Every time you reflect your confidence onto someone else, they too will refract some of that confidence and essentially absorb it. You being a positive light source around your friends will not only benefit you but also your friends. So, it’s a win-win for all. Obviously your confidence will not make them automatically reach your level of confidence – Snell’s law, anyone? An index of refraction times the sine of the angle of incidence will equal the index of refraction for the substance the wave travels into times the sine of the angle of refraction. And since the refraction index for air is approximately 1 and for any other substance is greater than 1, that means the angle of refraction will always be less than the angle of incidence. In other words…

So, while your friends may not fully reflect back the same magnitude of confidence you exude,  you will be helping your friends by giving them some confidence to absorb and the rest can be refracted :).

Back to the non-physics lecture aspect of this post:

And the fact of the matter is this: I was too busy focusing on things that could have been instead of the amazing things that did happen. I mean, I’m a student on a professional board of directors! I’m getting published! I’m going to be receiving a third degree and going to become a doctor (in like seven years, but still it’s going to happen)! And I’m tall, dark and handsome and have some amazing people around me. While there is room for improvement (there always is, and it’s usually my driving force), those things are worth appreciating and celebrating, too.

The thing that I realized last night and this morning while talking to family and friends (you know who you are) is that life is too short to nit-pick at every little detail and get engulfed in all the negativity surrounding you. Like an atom, sift through those electrons and find yourself that neutron-proton center!

Except that the electrons actually move randomly around the center…

Okay, what I mean is that negativity can surround you, but you have to dismiss it and try to hold on to that positivity that is RIGHT THERE. That’s the thing. Maintaining a positive outlook on life can lead to a healthier self image, more positive outcomes and general happiness. And that’s the type of life I’m all about living, y’all. So say #ByeFelicia to all the trash talking and sadness around you and embrace the fact the you’re alive and great things are happening all around you, because, trust me, life is so much better when you’re surrounding yourself with positivity.